Stop. Jimmer Time!

"I LOVE SWEENEYVILLE!"

-actual quote from the Jimmer




TOP TEN NAMES AL FREDETTE ALMOST GAVE HIS SON:

10. Timmer
9. Stever
8. Robber
7. LaVeller
6. Philler
5. Marker
4. Chipper
3. Brighammer
2. Johnner
1. Regis



TOP FOURTEEN LITTLE KNOWN FACTS ABOUT JIMMER

14. Sometimes spells his name with three M's just for fun
13. He got his first church calling when he was 4 (Ward Ninja)
12. He's majoring in Floral Design
11. Gets to call President Samuelson by his nickname: Stinky
10. Can’t curl his tongue but can curl his cerebral cortex
9. His patriarchal blessing is 18 pages long and has nothing to do with basketball
8. He hates Cosmo's guts
7. His middle name is Crackscorn
6. Went to Ireland and the Blarney Stone kissed HIM
5. He's the emergency contact for the 3 Nephites
4. His favorite show is the one with that giant wuss Bear Grylls
3. Once tugged on Superman's cape, spit into the wind, tore the mask off the ol' Lone Ranger AND messed around with Jim
2. The new pulpit in the Conference Center will be made of wood from his cradle
1. He's been tapped to be the next Dread Pirate Roberts



IT'S JIMMERICK TIME!!!

From Dad:

The Cougars now play the Gators
And they are all Jimmer-haters
But we'll play them again
And when we beat them then
We'll be the Elite Eight-ers!

The LDS bacchanalia
Is wearing more Jimmer regalia.
Moderation? Oh no.
Hey, I’ve got to go
Buy me more Jimmer paraphernalia!


The Gators will try to attack it
To see if this time they can crack it.
But our defense will hold
And shut them out cold.
Dang! That will blow up my bracket!


If we're asked in a text or a tweet
Who the Cougars are next going to beat
We'll say it's the Gators,
But not 'cuz we're haters,
It's cuz Jimmer Fredette is soooo sweet!

While watching young Jimmer Fredette
Billy Donovan started to sweat.
“He’s a shooter superb,
In fact, he’s a verb
And Jimmered is what we might get!”

From Brian: (Finally!!)

Jimmer: King of the orange-stripey ball,
Has a three-fold mission to preach unto all:
Proclaim his dominance,
Perfect his shot at the Dance,
and Redeem BYU basketball.

(I would expect nothing less from Brian. Nice work ;)



From Mom!

It's BYU vs the Gators today,
and Jimmer is ready to play.
If we win, he'll be king.
If we lose it will be a sad thing.
Either way, in our hearts he will stay!



From Me:

Because of our dearest sweet Jimmer
Our hopes are now more than a glimmer!
He sets up to shoot,
The crowd all goes mute-
It goes in without hitting the rimmer!!!!!!


Cougar fans always have trials.
It seems like we've waited a whiles
For a reason to cheer,
but King Jimmer is here!
And now we are nothing but smiles :)


Madonna, Bono and Cher
have but one name as we're all aware.
But here is one more
you cannot ignore-
'Jimmer', now that name is rare!

Let's GO COUGARS!

(Because I really love my Alma Mater, but mostly because I want to keep writing Jimmericks...)