Saturday, July 30, 2011
Now turning to something else that is painful to watch, I would like to talk about X-games. It may not be well-known, but I actually love the X-Games. It's going on right now, in fact, and I got to watch a good chunk of street skating while on the elliptical today. Honestly, X-Games is one of my favorite competitions and I will give you 5 reasons why:
1. Dressed to thrill. With the exception of motocross, these guys compete in jeans, t-shirts and maybe a helmet. There is no crazy equipment, no special shoes really, and limited pads. For the most part they look like they just got out of school and walked to the stadium.
2. Go big or go home. There seems to be a prevailing attitude at X-Games that unless you go big and risk it all, you are a giant wuss. These guys don't believe in playing it safe, and consequently these contests usually become ultimate games of 'can-you-top-this." I think most of these guys would rather go down in flames and miss the podium completely because they tried a monster trick that no one ever saw before, rather than take the safe road. As long as they try they always get respect.
3. Save the drama for your momma. With the Olympics you usually get all these long, amazing stories about athletes and how their entire lives have come down to a single moment, or how an entire nation is counting on them for victory, but with X-games these guys are kids! Most of them are still teenagers so they don't have these long drawn out stories of triumph and tragedy. Usually just stories of who they took to prom or why they hate homeroom.
4. Oh, don't mind us. When you think of figure skating or gymnastics routines, they are so rigid, intense and always have to meet about a thousand different criteria. X-games routines I'm sure are choreographed, but they make it seem like they aren't. Instead you feel like you're watching a bunch of kids just goofing off at a skate park. It never feels like anything they do is planned.
5. The thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. As a result of the go big or go home attitude, you do get to see some spectacular wipe outs. And because of the dress code for most competitions, said wipe outs can be quite painful. Much like all the footage of skateboarding on AFV, it can have a very high cringe factor. But that's exactly what makes it so fun to watch :)
So if you have ESPN, tonight you can watch Shaun White (Vancouver Snowboarding Gold Medalist) try and win the Skatboarding Vert title. See, isn't that cool? He's a snowboarder that can also skateboard! I mean, that's insane, right??! How does he go from one to the other? The world may never know.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
I got a text earlier today from a friend asking me how I was celebrating National Chocolate Day. I was pretty sure that this holiday was a few weeks ago, so upon double-checking, my reliable sources indicate that today is actually National Milk Chocolate Day, which is a laugh, because what is there to celebrate about MILK chocolate?? Nothing! It is officially the red headed step-child of confections. I know, you hate that I am so ambivalent sometimes. Now, National Dark Chocolate day would be a completely different story. I mean, for that day I would be eating it, baking with it, swimming in it, finger painting with it, using it for sunscreen, styling my hair with it- the possibilities are endless, really.
So I guess the answer to the question of what am I doing to celebrate National Milk Chocolate Day is painting Cindy's room and letting Luke watch the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers Movie. Yep, that pretty much has been my whole day. Cindy does not know that I am repainting her room. I just figured the best time to clean out her old clothes, toys and bedding was while she was 2,000 miles away and unable to offer any opinions :) Luke already told me what I was in for, though. After he saw the very boring neutral light brown get painted on he said, "Well, I don't think Cindy is going to like this." Well, of course she won't! But she will like the fact that she gets new bedding, clean carpet, more space and little more decoration going on in her room. I will post pictures as soon as I get the last little accessories in place.
Finally, there is one shout out I need to make. And I shall do so with a poem:
Hope your day was fantastic, awesome and happy.
Thanks for taking care of Mom and being my pappy.
You're the greatest and bestest dad in the world;
you killed lots of bugs when I would've hurled.
You also are funny, kind and witty
and we only kinda once lived near the inner city.
You are generous with others and take care of your pets,
and you even wrote a book of mission vignettes.
You know lots of stuff; you're a jack of all trades
you kill at general trivia and rock at charades.
I guess what I'm saying is I'm glad you were born,
for without your DNA I might like candy corn. (Ew!)
So Happy Birthday, dear dad, this poem is for you
I hope that you liked it because now it is over.
Oh, I kill me :)
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Friday, July 22, 2011
And this was just overheard from Luke in the hallway: "Barnacles, barnacles, BARNACLES! If I had my bug tweezers I could pick up this roach in the hallway!" It's Florida. There's always a roach in the hallway :)
Thursday, July 21, 2011
Official Game Report: Cindy's team had no subs for the game, which meant lots of playing time for the four that showed up. She had about 6 shots on goal and finally hit the back of the net in the second half. It was actually a very pretty goal; midair with some punch to it. She even got a Super Star patch for her efforts. (I think it was her magical braids) Go Ravens!
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
These were supposedly gourmet lollipops, but honestly, I was not really impressed. Mine gave no hint of cheesecake, but tasted only like cherry. Luke, Cindy and Jacob all seemed to enjoy theirs- although Luke's tasted to me a little like cinnamon wax.
Yesterday was either National Daiquari Day or Raspberry Cake Day. I wasn't feeling either of those, so I celebrated Have a Hilariously Good time with a Friend at a Water Park Day. Thanks, Davina! It was hoot :)
Cindy was finally tall enough and brave enough to tackle the yellow slide. And then she spent almost 3 hours doing only that :)
Luke was not tall enough for the yellow slide, but he had fun anyway. Manly Spiderman bathing suits tend to do that.
Oh, Ryan! You are so smiley, why must you spite me so?
Monday, July 18, 2011
We hug our children everyday, but here is rare photo evidence of Jacob giving Luke a good squeeze :) This picture was taken tonight while we went ice skating for FHE. Luke was by far the littlest kid on the ice but with a little help from mom, he made it around the rink many, many times. He liked skating way more than I thought he would! Cindy on the other hand, was a little more dramatic and ended up shedding more than a few tears because she couldn't let go of the wall and wanted to be a professional figure skater by the time we left two hours later. Oy!
Skating was followed by dinner at Subway, which was followed by cookies, playing with kittens and Star Trek: TNG on Netflix. Is this heaven? Nope, it's Family Night.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
I actually celebrated 3 holidays yesterday. The first being Cow Appreciation Day. And what better way to celebrate that than lunch at Longhorn Steakhouse. Cows, I appreciate you so much. Especially when I bite into my medium-well bacon cheddar burger, whose patty is bigger than my face. Maybe it's because I only eat ground turkey at home, but that burger truly was incredible. No really, cows, you complete me.
Next I celebrated National Cry Throughout a Movie For No Apparent Reason Day. Okay, this one might exist just in my head, but that doesn't mean it isn't real, right? ;) Jacob and I went and saw Harry Potter after our Longhorn lunch. I guess I was caught off-guard by how much I really came to care for all the characters in this series, but I found myself crying at all different parts of that movie. Watching it end was a little bit painful! I am not a big fan of change, mostly because it means the end of something. And how can I live in a world where a new Harry Potter movie doesn't come out every Christmas? It's gonna take some time to adjust.
Finally, after the movie we hit the DQ for some Blizzards. I knew that today was National Ice Cream Day, but I wanted to do all of my diet damage in one day, rather than split it over two. I haven't had that much ice cream in a while, but it was pretty good. Can't go wrong with something called Chocolate Explosion, though, can you? And since cows also give us milk, well, it was simply another way to show my appreciation for all the overachieving they do.
So there was my Saturday; partying, festivities, Harry Potter, crying, explosions of chocolate, appreciating cows- it is never a dull moment around this place. And the party train ain't stopping yet, because guess who gets to clip Rosa's nails tonight! Bring. It. On.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Thursday, July 14, 2011
And now time for a Luke Quickie...
Tonight at dinner, Cindy was being pretty silly. Every time she would eat a chip, she would talk to it and then laugh. Luke thought this was a good idea, so he started doing it too, and then everything else she did. I made mention to Cindy that this was the perfect example of why she needed to always do what's right; because Luke will do anything she does. After the mimmicking continued, I finally asked Luke, "If Cindy jumped off the top of a tall building, would you do it too?" He seemed confused, but after a while he sighed and said, "Well, it would be scary, but I would do it." Remind me to have a talk with Cindy about not jumping off the top of buildings.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Prosecutor: Mrs. Sweeney, the court would now like to take a quick inventory. We have a few questions concerning some of your behaviors and possessions that will help the jury evaluate your geek tendencies. Please remember you are under oath."
Me: As long as we hurry; there is a documentary on JarJar Binks that starts at 3 on SyFy.
Prosecutor: Do you or do you not own all three seasons of Star Trek: The Original Series on DVD?
Me: Yes. It is much easier to catch all the technical inaccuracies watching the episodes at half speed then to spot them during a regular Trek marathon on cable.
Prosecutor: And how many Star Trek captains uniforms do you own?
Me: I personally own zero. However, there are two hanging in my closet.
Prosecutor: Do you own any other Star Trek paraphernalia?
Me: That depends; do my 8 Collectible Star Trek glasses from Burger King count?
Me: What about my Star Trek Pin Set Christmas ornament?
Me: And my David Hasselhoff marble collection?
Prosecutor: No, but the jury is instructed to not ignore that statement.
Prosecutor: Do you or do you not own a Harry Potter T-shirt which identifies you as the "Gryffindor Quidditch Team Captain?"
Me: In my defense, it cost me less than two galleons, which is a STEAL! Am I right? I mean, usually it would cost at least 10 oz. of goblin gold for something of that quality.
Prosecutor: And will you be wearing this to the final Harry Potter movie this weekend?
Me: It clashes a bit with Jacob's dress robes, so it's still up in the air.
Prosecutor: I see.
Prosecutor: Does your current desktop PC have dual monitors?
Me: Well, I can't watch Battlestar Galactica and Dr. Who at the same time with just one, can I?
Prosecutor: And who assembled your current desktop PC?
Me: My husband.
Prosecutor: And may I ask what he does for a living?
Me: He teaches Algebra to nitwits.
Prosecutor: Can he quote the quadratic formula off the top of his head?
Me: Only when I need him to. Which is usually just when I am computing how far two trains are from each other if one leaves Boston at 1pm going 89 mph and the other leaves Phoenix at 1:30 going 85 mph. So, I would postulate, about every other day maybe?
Prosecutor: Do you own the game Risk?
Me: Classic version or Lord of the Rings Limited Edition? Because we have both and I don't know which one you are referring to.
Prosecutor: How many light sabers are currently in your home?
Me: Well, my son is named Luke, so what do you expect?
Prosecutor: Wait, so you named your son after Luke Skywalker from Star Wars?
Me: Ummmm, actually it was after the apostle Luke. Yeah. The apostle. Definitely him.
Prosecutor: Have you ever named any of your pets after SyFy characters?
Prosecutor: Please tell the court about said animals and their names.
Me: We may or may not have had a cat named 7 of 9, a kitten named Chewbacca, and some more kittens named Luke, Han and Darth Vader.
Prosecutor: Finally, we would like to enter into evidence, Exhibit A, which is the following photo:
Prosecutor: Mrs. Sweeney, is this not a picture of you lighting numbered candles on a chicken pot pie on March 14, 2010, or "Pi Day" as it is referred to?
Me: Hmmm, hard to tell. The hair is all wrong, the arms are way too flabby to be mine ;) and the box of matches is covering up the last number, which looks to me like the letter A. And that alphanumeric combination only makes sense if you were programming something in Pascal or Delphi! Which, don't make me laugh, is so 14 years ago!! Haahahhhhaaaaahaaaaaaaaaa!
Prosecutor: Your Honor, that's all we have for now. The Prosecution rests. Thank you for your cooperation, Mrs. Sweeney.
Me: Live long and prosper.
Too bad I couldn't counter all that evidence with this very blog post. Because writing and blogging fictional courtroom dramas about how much of a geek I am is the epitome of cool, don't you think?
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Apparently there are people out there among us just walkin' around with two different color eyes. Interesting, huh? And today is their day! So Happy Heterochromia Iridium Day! Having two different colored eyes comes from each eye having different levels of melanin (pigment) in them. And technically your eye color can change over time if suddenly your eyes start to produce more or less melanin, so watch out! This also explains why my kittens have pretty blue eyes now, but sadly they will turn into boring brown eyes when they get bigger. I sure hope Luke doesn't all of a sudden start making a bunch of melanin. I would be crushed if his eyes ever changed :( So the question I have for you is do any of you out there have two different color eyes or do you know anyone that does? I would have to say no to both of those questions. At least on a personal level, but click here for a slide show of a few celebrities that have this trait. Who knew?!
Missing from the slide show is David Bowie, who technically has two different colored eyes, but only because one is permanently dilated from an injury. Wow, if there was one person on the planet that didn't need any extra trait like that to make them any creepier than they already were, it's gotta be him. Labyrinth, I tell you. It's all because of dumb Labyrinth! Well, that and his crazy cheekbones. And his singing. And his teeth. And his weird hair. And most of the clothes he ever wore. And his accent. And Little Drummer Boy. But other than that, I can handle him.
Monday, July 11, 2011
Like many of you, we had to hit the 7-11 for a free Slurpee this morning. Luke got banana, Cindy got blue raspberry, and I got wild cherry to give to them so they could fight over it.
And to keep the freebie train rolling, we just got back from FHE at the bowling alley where Luke and Cindy bowled for free. Well, Luke bowled for free. Cindy complained and whined and pouted about how bad she was for free. So I guess that is still a deal. Maybe?
Finally, is there anything in the whole entire world cuter than kittens ???! No, there isn't!
I just can't stand how cute these things are! (And how they can sleep in absolutely any position on top of each other in one gigantic fur ball) They will be four weeks old tomorrow and they are right on the cusp of actually being playful and fun. They started walking all over the place and they follow you around with their remote control tails up in the air. Oh, they are just the best! And would you also believe that today is National Cheer up the Lonely Day!? Which is perfect because kittens are so great at that!
Here now is a clip from the show Scrubs, which pretty much encapsulates my lifelong dream of how to cheer someone up appropriately: (minus the weird side effects at the end)
(make sure your volume is up)
I really think that my brother Chris needs to prescribe kittens to someone on his first day at his new hospital job in Tennessee. He can just tell them that is how we do things in Florida; Plan A: Sunshine. Plan B: Kittens. I love living here!
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Also, if anyone was wondering about the answer to my question about which one song came up in my song library for the search word 'chocolate'- (thanks for all the great song suggestions, by the way, Nathan and Karin :) well, the answer is "You Sexy Thing" by Hot Chocolate. Also known as "I believe in Miracles." Google it. You know it :)
And just as a sidenote, today is Pina Colada Day. So to make this something I actually wanted to eat right now, I tweeked a recipe to be more of a Pina Colada parfait with greek yogurt, pineapple juice, toasted coconut and some bananas. Not the most incredible pina colada flavor, but it was healthy and not completely illegal on my diet. Wacky holiday: consider yourself celebrated!
Saturday, July 9, 2011
These actually double as cookie cutters or egg makers, which is good because I can't just eat gun shaped cookies, I must have gun shaped eggs. Life would be utterly incomplete without firearms at breakfast.
You were never this close to actually being Pac-man...
We all know what to get my brother Brian for Christmas now.
I love these guys! Eating these would be a 'kick' wouldn't it? Ah, I kill me.
I want to eat this dragon cookie just because look at the size of the cookie you would get to eat! It's like eating two Ninjabread Men.
Actually, here are some obvious pantywaist gingerbread men that just got Jimmered by the Ninjas.
Unexplainable. Oh wait, it's German.
And finally, one of my more creepier Internet finds so far this year. Because cute little stork or carriage shaped cookies are way too silly for a baby shower. We demand accuracy, people! We need fetus cookies and we need them NOW.
P.S. Sissy heart cookies at Valentine's Day will now be replaced with these:
To be honest, I suck at making roll out shaped cookies. I mean, I do enjoy myself a tasty sugar cookie, but they are a lot of work and I can't ever seem to get the dough cold enough to not stick to the counter. Plus, they do not inherently come with chocolate in them, so they can't possibly be my favorite. What is my favorite cookie? Well, sometimes I am pretty sure it's these:
Alien Oreos! I really would buy way more of these if they glowed. Just a tip, Nabisco.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Cucuface is not actually a cat. She is a powerful, carnivorous feline android sent from the Omega Centauri galaxy to be my domesticated pet and protect me and my family from the evil Grox, which are cleverly disguised as harmless squirrels. I know, right?! I have kept this information from you for way too long, but I feel the time is especially appropriate given that this morning Cucuface caught a squirrel and proceeded to lay it out on my driveway and eat the front half of it WHOLE. That was at about 9am and she has been chowing down on that thing all day. Do you hear what I am telling you!?!?!? She ate the entire head, skull, brains, neck, bones, ARMS, FUR- everything. If you want pictorial evidence, I do have it, but honestly I was gagging while taking the picture and didn't want to offend any of my readers. (Davina Fallaw, whose children came over to play today, took a lovely photo on her phone and tagged me on Facebook with it, so maybe you can take a peek there if just have to see it.) Thanks for protecting us, Cucu. You've performed admirably.
AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT:
Today is also Chocolate Day! How was that for a segue? And if you want the truth about that, I am a certified Chocoholic. I didn't really think I was but when I go over the evidence, I really, really, really do LOVE chocolate! (Dark Chocolate being the real deal, milk chocolate is for posers.) Cake, pie, cereal, brownies, doughnuts, s'mores (sorry Nathan) Frosties, sundaes, milkshakes, tootsie pops, smoothies, valentine's candy, peeps- whatever it is- I always prefer chocolate. Take me to an ice cream shop and I will never pick a fruit flavored treat. Ever. I will always choose the chocolate. As for the celebration of said holiday, we are going with the old standby of fondue:
And just for kicks, can anyone guess or tell me what ONE song (title and artist required)comes up in my 8,000 song library when I type in the search word 'chocolate'? I will put your picture on this blog if you can figure it out :)
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
And if chicken isn't your thing, well there is always National Kissing Day, which they celebrate today in the UK (good lookin' out, Linnley!). Personally, it's like National Kissing Day with me and Jacob all the time, so we don't really need a special day for that. Oh yeah!
P.S. If you are wondering what happened to yesterday's holiday, it was actually Workaholics Day; a holiday I have absolutely NOTHING in common with. In fact, I directly thumbed my finger in this holiday's face by not doing much of anything at all yesterday.
Well, except for putting all five kittens on both of my children :)
Monday, July 4, 2011
I did paint her toenails and fingernails to match mine:
And we did just find the kittens that Cucuface moved:
(After searching our entire yard 6 times, almost crawling under our shed, saying prayers and then patiently spying on Cucuface, we found them in the old rabbit cage about 3 feet from their old box. Right under our noses. Good grief!)
***Side note: It has been determined that Leia is actually a boy, so she has been renamed Han.
And finally, I did find one little clip for us all to enjoy from comedian Jim Gaffigan that really sums up July 4th:
HAVE A GREAT HOLIDAY EVERYONE!
Saturday, July 2, 2011
One of my favorite movie lines ever :)
Friday, July 1, 2011
Although I have never been to Canada, I am actually part Canadian, so this is right up my alley. I now give you:
The Best and Worst Things that Come from Canada
My Grandpa Bingham
Government-run health care
Thanksgiving in October
Spelling regular words with an extra 'u' (i.e. What's your favourite flavour? Coucounut, of course!)
Well, that is all fine and dandy, but you must be wondering how am I actually celebrating Canada Day. I will tell you; I made a list on my blog! Didn't you just read it? Sheesh! And as an added bonus I will relate to you that while reading Old Testament scripture stories the other night, Cindy kept reading the word 'Canaan' as Canada, which made the story of the Israelites a thousand times more exciting. Bless you, Cindy!