Cindy and Luke-(sigh)- LOVE to watch the cartoon Dora the Explorer. I tolerate this show for two reasons: 1. Because it keeps the kids entertained and 2. it actually has taught Cindy to be very interested in speaking Spanish. She even knows most of the colors, the numbers 1-10 and assorted other action words. But the show itself is pretty much ridiculous. So ridiculous in fact, that I decided, What would it be like if my day were like an episode of Dora the Explorer? Hmmm... I wonder...... (insert dreamy harp music here)
(<------And my apologies for how totally creepy that picture over there turned out...)
After waking up in the clothes I am going to wear for the day, I make breakfast for me and the kids- who eat every bite and hang on my every word. I then get an urgent phone call from my mami that I have to mail Uncle Brian his super special birthday present (a magical tie) so he can wear it when he meets the President of Spain! I consult my singing map to plan out the best course of action. He advises that in order to get to the post office, I need to go through the CVS drive thru, then through the MidFlorida bank line and then I will be at the Post Office. When I get to the CVS drive through, the Pharmacist is actually an evil Ice Fairy that will only release my prescription if I can answer this riddle: "What does a cat have that no other animal has?" Of course, Cindy and Luke figure that one out in about 3 seconds- "Kittens!" they shout. The evil Ice Fairy curses my name, but I get the prescription and we are off to the the bank. We then break out into song, "Where are we going?" (Clap, clap, clap) "To The Post Office!" Where are we going?" (Clap, clap, clap) "To the post office!" We are almost to the Bank entrance when we realize that there are baby chicks all over the road blocking the way! Oh No! We'll never make it in time to mail Uncle Brian the super special birthday present! But wait, Cindy has an idea! If we sing the chicks a song about their mommies, they will follow her off the road and back into their pen! Cindy begins to sing:
"Los pollitos dicen
Pio, pio, pio
Cuando tienen hambre
Cuandon tienen frio
Bajo sus dos alas
Se estan quietecitos
Y hasta el otro dia
It's working! The chicks are following Cindy off the road and back into their pen! The road is now clear. We make it into the drive through line at the bank. I send in the check for deposit. But wait, the speaker is broken! We are just going to have to talk really loud so that the teller can hear us. Say it with me "We need to make a deposit!" LOUDER! "We need to make a deposit!!!" LOUDER!!! "WE NEED TO MAKE A DEPOSIT!!!!" Great job everyone! The teller heard us and put the check in the bank. Now we just have to go to the Post Office to mail the super special birthday present for Uncle Brian. As we drive to the post office, we see something sneaky hiding behind the telephone pole at the intersection. Who could it be? Swiper the Fox! He wants to swipe the birthday present! Everyone say, "Swiper, No Swiping!" Yay! We did it! (Swiper: "Awwww man!") As we pull into the Post Office parking lot, it has been flooded by the overflowing Crystal Lake. There is water everywhere AND lots of hungry alligators that want to eat our package! We are going to have to hop from alligator to alligator to make it into the Post Office. When I say "salta" be sure to jump! Ready? Salta!... Salta!!... Salta!!! We did it! We made it past the hungry alligators and into the Post Office. After a 2 minute wait in line, we deliver Uncle Brian's super special birthday package to the magical mail troll, who puts a spell on it and instantly transports it to Spain. Uncle Brian opens the package just minutes before he is to meet the President. And when hen he does meet him, the President decides that on account of the tie, the whole country will be commanded to convert to Mormonism. We all celebrate with impromptu singing! "We did it, we did it, we did it, yeah! When Brian needed a tie and there was no time to cry, yeah, we did it, we did it, we did it YAY! Did we let all that stuff ever get in our way? No! Lo hicimos, we did it, we did it, Hooray!!!"
What? It could happen...