I can't believe I did not remember this for yesterday's post. Something that ALWAYS makes me laugh...
BYU Police Beat!!!! (directly from the pages of the Daily Universe)(and I am not making these up)
A faculty member claimed someone entered his office in the Snell building and took football tickets from his desk. The police checked the seats during the game but there was nobody with his tickets.
Someone stripped the left front turn signal off a 1987 Dodge Raider in the 2nd level parking lot in the JFSB. The estimate damage is $25.
A female student reported that someone was tapping at her window at John Hall in Helaman Halls Sept. 3 and she saw a mannequin head on a pole. There were 15 people in the area with two heads on poles. The case is closed and there are no suspects.
An older male was reported for suspicious activity after someone noticed him opening all the washers and dryers in the laundry at Wyview Park. When he was confronted it was learned that he had personal items in each of the washers and dryers.
Jan. 24: A witness reported a suspicious male standing outside the Joseph Smith Building at 10:30 a.m. The male was wearing a black cloak and was singing to himself. He had been there for 45 minutes. Upon being questioned, the male said he was waiting for his class to begin and was happy. He said he was cold and was singing to keep warm.
April 11: BYU police received a call that four male students were using the Helaman Halls pool even though it was not open yet. When the police officer arrived he was able to locate the students because they were the only students walking home wet.
April 14: A student called BYU Police when she saw a creepy looking person smoking by the Administration Building.
June 2
A blind deer was found by a resident at the Wymount Terrace. Provo Animal Control was called and they came and took care of the animal. They knew it was blind because it was running into things.
May 31
A student called and reported suspicious behavior at 11 p.m.. A car had been running around the law school parking lot for 30 minutes, police said. When the officer arrived the male explained he was teaching his girlfriend how to drive.
April 8: A 6-year-old boy called the police when his 9-year-old brother would not let him watch television. BYU police checked the situation to make sure the boys were supervised. Both boys were fine.
And now a joke that is quite timely... (Thanks, Christina!!)While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies.
His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.
'Welcome to heaven,' says St. Peter. 'Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you.'
'No problem, just let me in,' says the senator.
'Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.'
'Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,' says the senator.
'I'm sorry, but we have our rules.'
And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.
Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people.
They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne.
Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he
realizes it, it is time to go.
Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises ..
The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him.
'Now it's time to visit heaven.'
So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.
'Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity.'
The senator reflects for a minute, then answers: 'Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell.'
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.
Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage.
He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above...
The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.
'I don't understand,' stammers the senator. 'Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?'
The devil looks at him, smiles and says.......
'Yesterday we were campaigning. Today you voted.'
Here come the Pilgrims on the Mayflower to meet the Indians
Good Times!
AND, just across the water was KSC and the lit up launch pad. Such an awesome sight! After about a 10 minute wait and minute-by-minute updates by the Space Crazies (you know, the guys who set up there that morning with TVs, laptops, telescopes, are wearing earphones and listening to the live NASA feed, oh yeah- they take this very seriously), we had liftoff! My amatuer video shows a little what it was like- but definitely does not do it hardly any justice. It was so bright! Literally like the sun coming up in the morning. (Hence the title of this post- the description my Dad uttered as we walked back to the car.) As we were watching it lift off, my dad kept saying "The sound wave will be here any minute" and finally after about 2 minutes, it arrived and it was loud! Deep and rumbling. It totally made the whole experience. That really made you feel close the action. After the launch, well, things weren't exactly the picture perfect ending I had hoped for. My car overheated, (thank you Dad for bringing "the curse" with you- but also for making sure we made it home:) and traffic was something out of a horror movie where all of New York City is trying to evacuate down a one lane road at 3mph. Seriously, the backup was about 40 miles long. Bumper to bumper, stop and go, it was horrendous. The launch was done at about 8:10, we got home at 2:30am. We finally found that the entire backup for 40 miles was pretty much because of an OPERATING toll booth at the 417 in Orlando. It was absolutely mindblowing that they would be operating the tolls while traffic was that bad, that late into the morning. Simply astounding. However, the long drive did make for a good time of watching The Princess Bride, trying to play guess the animal (which Cindy never did want to play), some awesome radio cranking of toe-tapping country music (seeing as how my mom was not around to roll her eyes and make fake throw up noises when it came on), and consuming mass quantities of Teddy Grahams. So enjoy the video and if you ever get the chance to see a night launch- (in the words of Nike) Just Do It! But book a hotel room, beacuse you ain't going no where when its over. :)
This little Pothos vine started creeping out of the disgusting plant jungle by my front door and is now making its way up the house. On the one hand it is totally creeping me out, but on the other hand I secretly want to see if it can reach the roof. 
So the other night we were playing the card game Old Maid. Every time we have played this game with Cindy, Jacob can get her to pick the Old Maid simply by placing that card higher than any other card in his hand. It never fails!! This particular game was ending with either me or Jacob having the Old Maid. I had to pick from Jacob, so he offered his cards out to me so I could pick. As I was deciding which of the two to choose, Cindy urgently leaned over and whispered 
You know how over time you and your spouse are supposed to start looking like each other? Well, I can't really comment on whether or not Jacob and I look like each other, but I have definitely picked up on some of his habits. Some that I never thought I would. Specifically, his distaste for talking on the phone and, pretty much all phone interaction in general. (Now, if you have ever talked to me on the phone, or tried to talk to me on the phone or left me a message on the phone before and you have NOT noticed this about me, please turn your wrist over and check for a pulse, because you might not be conscious.) I was not always this way. I remember when Jacob and I started dating. I thought we would be one of those couples that talked for hours on the phone every night about the stupidest things and could only hang up after fighting over who would say goodbye first. Oh no, not us. Not even close. You see, Jacob (and pretty much his family as a whole) are not phone people. Jacob will get a call from his sister, who he has not spoken to in over 6 months, and answer the phone by saying, "What?". This was shocking to me. But I can unfortunately say that in the 9 years since I met Jacob I have turned to the dark side of phone behavior. The side that does not want to answer the phone. The side that fears the message. The side that simultaneously loves that with a cell phone you can talk to people anywhere, but also hates that with a cell phone you can talk to people anywhere. This is absolutely not a declaration of "Please don't call me"- but more of an explanation at why I am so lame and flaky when it comes to phone interaction. I would hate for my socially awkward Telephophobia to be misconstrued as deliberate acts of a cold hearted robot. (FYI---> Telephonophobia: fear of the phone- I am not making that up, it is real. In fact, I was a little frightened by the mass amount of info that popped up when I Googled it.) I guess I just have my preferred ways of communication, and, mostly because I am WAY better at writing than speaking(obviously ;), I prefer those methods: the email, the text, the handwritten letter, the telegram, the singing Valentine, the Mime, etc. Additionally, I am so BAD on the phone. I say weird things, I talk at the same time as the other person, my phone breaks up, I have bad hearing, I can't understand accents, the list goes on! I never get off the phone thinking, "Yes, that went well." I usually think "Wow, how do I get by in life?" So there you have it, true confessions of a telephonophobe. Give me a call and tell me what you think. Hold that- text me instead.
