A Day In The Life

Yesterday when Luke got in the car after I picked him up from school he told me he wasn't feeling good.  He said he threw up after lunch and had a headache.  I asked him if he told his teacher and he said no.  Yep, that sounds like Luke!  I wasn't sure if he really threw up but when we got home, he hit the couch and did not get up until Cindy's softball game. He wasn't running a fever at all and when we got to the ballpark he started out a little sluggish but perked up when he found some friends, so I figured he was fine.  However, about 20 minutes into Cindy's game, he froze and looked at me with panicked eyes and said, "I think I need to throw up!"  Luke is a total traditionalist and the toilet is pretty much the one place he thinks he can throw up, so he started his way to the ballpark bathroom.  Ten steps in he did a horrendous belch and I thought we were all goners.  But nothing followed and so he told me he was gonna run for the bathroom.  That boy took off with speed I will never see again in this lifetime.  He was FLYING and just as he rounded the corner nearing the bathrooms, his whole body went airborne, limbs flailing, and he projectile vomited into the air in a spectacular display of technicolor yawn, some of which came back onto his clothes because of the direction of the wind.  I believe I saw this all happen in slow motion and can only say a silent prayer of thanks that no one was coming around the corner in the other direction at that moment.  He then stopped and looked at me as if to say, 'I just threw up OUTSIDE- what do I do now?' Throw up some more! was the apparent answer because no sooner had I caught up to him to pat his back and ask if he was okay, when more puke came out directly at my feet, causing me to jump in the air like an Olympic hurdler.  But that isn't even the best part! The best part is that all this happened in front of two full bleachers of parents and all the people eating their ballpark dinners at the picnic tables under the bathroom pavilion.  They didn't know they were going to get a meal and a show.  Ordinarily I would die of embarrassment from something like this, but the situation was just way too ridiculous and my only reaction was hysterical laughing.  Parenthood: Not for Wimps!