My Official Review of Iron Man 3

image

And so the Summer 2013 movie season has officially begun!  Although I am much more excited about a certain sci-fi sequel coming out this very weekend, Jacob and I did take the time on Saturday night to check out Iron Man 3.  You give me a penny, I will give you my thoughts.  Just make sure you send them to the Sweeneyville home box office in Burlington, Vermont.




Pros
1.  Lots of Robert Downey Jr.
2.  The return of Pepper Potts and the most perfect ponytail/bangs combo ever.  I hate bangs, but if I had hair like Pepper, I would wear them like a boss.
3.  The little boy in Tennessee was a great foil for Tony and stole the show there for a while.
4.  The burning and exploding robot people were good.
5.  Ben Kingsley was a surprise!
6.  "Blue" by Eiffel 65 during the opening credits indeed took me back to 1999 :)
7.  Got to see a preview for Thor 2, which almost makes me want to stay awake for all of Thor 1 someday.

Cons
1.  No Phil Coulson
2.  I'll be honest, the plot was all over the place in this one; the botanist from his past, Killian, PTSD for Tony, The Mandarin, Big Oil, fighting fiery robot veterans and spending quality time in Tennessee, The VP being a traitor, relationship trouble for Tony and Pepper- just too many targets.
3.  Guy Pearce's awful teeth.
4.  Guy Pearce's awful hair.  And I am still confused on how he was supposed to be more handsome compared to Tony Stark. Even for 5 minutes. Nope, no way, no how.  Not in this lifetime.  (Okay, okay, I have hated Guy Pearce ever since The Count of Monte Cristo and I can't get past it.  Happy?)
5.  44 Iron Man's? Really?
6.  No AC/DC.
7.  The longest oil barge fight scene in the history of fight scenes.  Can someone get a timer on that thing?
8.  Not enough of Pepper/Tony Stark relationship development.  That really should have been the focus of the movie.  Kind of like the whole Spiderman/Mary Jane superhero tortured love dynamic.
9.  JARVIS was getting a little mouthy.
10.  "The Mandarin" was not really Chinese nor did he eat a single little orange during the entire movie.
11.  Super confused by the ending.  Not sure where this going.

And there you have it!  Hopefully I didn't spoil it for you.  In sum, I definitely enjoyed the movie; no doubt that it was entertaining and had some very funny moments, but it just didn't quite meet my incredibly high Iron Man standards.  It missed the mark for trying too hard.