Luke Quickies

Wednesday when I woke up Luke at 6:45, the first thing he whispered to me in his scratchy morning voice was, "Mom, guess what day it is.  Hump Day."  I don't think his eyes were even open yet.



And last night when I gave Luke his dinner, he sniffed it and said, "Oh, I know this chicken!"  But what I really love is that it was beef and broccoli.  But he ate all of it!  Which is more than I can say for Cindy...

This One's For You, Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike! I mean, Dad.

Cindy actually came up with this yesterday, so I made it for her this morning.

Do a little dance....

So here's the deal: With great blogs come great responsibility. What that has to do with Sweeneyville, I don't know. Okay, true confessions, I took a secret video of Luke last night.  We had cranked up the song "The Hampsterdance" (which is a song that Jacob and I first got to know through DJing many, many years ago), and it had a magical effect on Luke.  Usually this child does not 'dance' in any way, shape or form.  But he turned into a crazy man. Anyway, I am posting the secret video I took of this.  I have not told Luke that I did this because I don't want him to be embarrassed and think I am making fun of him.  I will save that emotion for the day of his wedding reception. For now, with great pride and a small request to not directly mention this to him in a derogatory way, I give you, Luke: my very own Lord of the Dance!  And the wrapping paper tube.

A Luke Quickie

Today I was playing a trivia game with the kids.  This is how it went down:

Me: Which book is the best-selling book of all time?
Cindy: Uhhh, the Book of Mormon?
Me: Not the Book of Mormon, but the....
Cindy: Bible!
Luke: The Bible is not silly!

As funny as it I thought it was that Luke thought I said the "best silly book" of all time, it makes me even more happy to know that he was truly offended that anyone would dare call the Bible silly :) Dang straight, Luke!

The Legend Continues

There is a picture of me as a patrol floating around somewhere too, but for now, it is just some straight up nostalgia courtesy of Cindy and her dear old dad.  

A Luke Quickie

Last night during his prayer Luke told Heavenly Father, "Thank you that we finally got a little bit of homework."  He must have hit his head harder than I thought!

That Awkward Moment When....

You realize you can share your clothes with your nine year old.

Let's Go WIldcats!

This "first day of school" photo from last week got a lot of traffic on my Facebook feed.  It wasn't so much that Cindy was annoyed with the prospect of school as she was annoyed with me.  She was tired of all the pictures.  This was the last one we took :)  

Three cheers for school!

 Okay, here is a much better, and earlier, photo with Dad.

Good looking family! I am such a lucky girl :)

And here is not only a good outside prior photo, but also the photo proof that out of all the over 40 sunflower seeds we planted earlier this summer, this is the only ONE that grew. ONE. Wow, my soil is sad.  And zombies will have great success in this neighborhood.

Save us Cucuface, you are our only defense!

Tubthumping (He got knocked down, but he got up again)

What is up with my house turning against me this week?  Last night Luke was attacked by the bathtub.  He cut his eyebrow open and I had to actually take him to urgent care and have it glued back together; the first time he has been to the doctor for any illness or injury since his last immunization at 18 months!  I was kind of expecting Blue Cross to call me with a fraud alert because my insurance actually got used.  This also marks the first time that either of my children have had simple stitches or glue.  Nine years without a laceration that warranted attention!  All my medical records seem to be breaking this week and since they say that bad things come in threes, I am pretty much going to bubble wrap my family and do as little as possible for the next 48 hours.

And after all the questions at church today it did remind me that I have been meaning to order these bandaids...

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So Far, So Great

I just started this program three days ago (it should have been five, but my stupid thumb delayed me) and so far I am really digging it.  I was completely skeptical that a true 20 minute workout could do anything for me, but this one really works.  Did I tell you it's 20 minutes?  Even Thursday and yesterday after working and coming home and not wanting to do anything, I had to do this because it only takes 20 minutes and I would be a total lame-o if I couldn't find 20 minutes to work out. There really is no excuse now.  After the first workout I did have the feeling that I had just done the warm-up for Insanity, but now after three days of doing this I feel really, really good.  Of course I have also stopped my summer diet of eating chocolate at every meal so that can't hurt either....

Thumbody Call the Doctor

So the full story on my thumb is that while leaning down to pick up a remote that was lying on the floor halfway under the cargo furniture chair that is in my living room, my thumb slid along the side of the chair and then a giant splinter got lodged underneath my thumbnail with no way to get it out because no part of the wood was free of my nail. (Good guess, Davina. So close with the flag theory. So close.)  And here is where working for a Doctor can come in real handy.  I got in to see our PA Tuesday afternoon and she numbed up my thumb enough to peel back my nail and take out the splinter which was in 6 pieces.  I am telling you, this was the smallest, yet most excruciating injury I have ever had. I had not gone to a doctor for something non-childbirth related since I was at BYU in 1999.  So my excellent injury-free record is broken :( And worst of all is that now I don't trust wood.  Rulers, furniture, firewood, toothpicks, rocking chairs, Obama's brain, chopsticks, wheelbarrows, broomsticks, bedknobs- yep, they are all on my shun list.  But at least after the splinter removal I was as good as new and my thumb was hardly even sore.  So in your face, splinter!  And good news, I can now get back to my life of constant texting, snapping and hitchiking.  And not going back to the doctor til 2026.

And here are some more people who are happy about my thumb:

Michael Buble

Jim Halpert

The Fonz

this cat

What Is The Deal With Dr. Who?

I can't take it anymore.  I just can't.  I am talking about having to tolerate the most annoying television show on planet earth. Dr.Who. Every time I log into Pinterest and click on the "Geek" tab, which I like to do because I obviously belong there, I get bombarded with crap about Dr. Who. Seriously, I dare you to log in right now and not have a Dr. Who pin in the first two rows. It is impossible. It is literally endless pins about blue phone booths and how to make your own Tardis dresses and Daleks of unusual sizes and eighty kajillion memes about David Tennant and running away with David Tennant and running away in a phone booth with David Tennant and it goes on and on and on. And on. And I don't even know who David Tennant is!  And it gets worse because then when I visit teefury.com for the quirky shirt of the day, nine times out of ten it is usually a shirt about Dr. Who. They should just rename the site drwhofury.com and save us all a lot of trouble.  Please go there now to see my point.

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Now, you could say the same thing about Star Wars.  To be fair, the Geek tab also lets you easily find a lot of pins showcasing Chewbacca slippers, plans for making your own r2-d2 trash can or patterns for a crocheted Princess Leia buns hat, but the difference is that Star Wars doesn't suck!

Have I attempted to watch Dr. Who and find out what all the fuss is about?  Yes. Twice. And both times it left me angry at the world in which I live.  (Click here for actual footage of what happens when I try to watch the show. This was when I had that really bad short haircut.) It is so bizarre that it is hard to even tell what is going on in the show.  The last time I tried to watch it there was a "woman" that had had so much plastic surgery that her face was a now just a tightly stretched piece of skin that was about the size of a pizza box with a pair of lips. That was it.  She could still talk and was wheeled around like a church chalkboard.  And she of course was in outer space.  And this is a show that has been on since 1963.  Are you kidding me?!  I am just absolutely mystified by the interest in this show.  It's British, it's made by the BBC- I get it.  I hate to be the one to break it to you but some shows by the BBC are actually terrible.  And Dr. Who is one of them.  Sorry Whovians, I just don't understand you and I never will.  Sherlockians, on the other hand? Take me to your leader.

i·ro·ny  

/ˈīrənē/

Noun The expression of one's meaning by using language that normally signifies the opposite, typically for humorous or emphatic effect. OR

Being a right-handed person and injuring your right thumb so badly you have to become a left-handed person on National Left-handed Day.  Yes, my streak of not visiting a medical professional for anything other than maternity issues may end this week at 13 years.

Okay, if you really want to know what I did, here is a picture of it that I drew left-handed in Paint:

Well, if that doesn't clear things up for you, then I don't know what will! Actually, I would love for people to comment and guess what happened to my finger based on this picture.  I just gotta know.

Davina, I am spending some time in your left-handed world.  

It is not as great as you make it out to be...

But please tell me you eat breakfast holding hands with Aaron every morning.

About Last Night

Every night before I go to bed, I sneak into Luke's room to check on him.  Because if I don't, I might miss something...

Captain's Log

Today while I was typing up medical notes, I was reading a few older ones to familiarize myself with the format a little more and I came across a note that said a patient was coming in to see the doctor because he hurt his knee after he "slipped on a banana."  I am not making this up.  Oddly enough his name was Wile E. Coyote.  I was also loving the 73 year old man who "plays kickball 4 to 5 times a week" who also happens to have the exact same name as his first name and last name.  Again, I am not making this up.  And that is how I spend my time at work.

As for the time not at work, well, it looks like this:

Monday night we hit the Ice Cream Factory, which is actually an awesome little place in the worst location here in Lakeland; next to Staples on South Florida Ave.  Not a great place right now but still, awesome ice cream.  Jacob got butter pecan with fudge and it was "the best ice cream he ever tasted."  I got something called Garbage Can, which is vanilla with "pieces of 7 different name brand candy bars"- and I think I got half a Baby Ruth in my second bite.  Amazing.  And here is Luke taking a lick of his Superman!  And that is about all he ate of it because I am starting to think that Luke doesn't actually like ice cream.  He just likes to hold it and let drip down his elbow and stain his pants.










Tuesday we did a little melty beads and Luke fell asleep with his gumball machine in his hands. He was looking pretty spooky, eh?

Wednesday we went out to eat and at the end of dinner, Jacob, like a true Sweeney, dared Cindy to drink a giant ramekin of mustard.  For $5.  And she did it!  Without throwing up!

And what did she do with her prize?  She bought 'As Seen On TV' hair chalk.  It was a dream come true.  For her.

And finally, I also discovered who Luke reminds me of:

SQUINTS!

Money Shot

And big thanks to Sean for doing a little photo-shopping on this picture for me.  It's a great shot of the cousins.  Even with Cindy's ridiculous face that clearly shows she is holding back her tongue in order to not get pummeled later on.  Grrrr....

Nashville and Everything Else

After the white coat ceremony we decided to let Chris be our guide and hit up the famous Broadway street in Nashville, which, surprisingly, is just about 5 miles down the road from Vanderbilt. Who knew? Broadway is the street that has all the famous country bars where country singer wannabes pay their dues and get discovered.  It is definitely one of those things you just have to do while in Nashville.  And according to TripAdvisor.com you also have to get some ice cream at "Mike's."  Which we did.  For dinner!  I had something called "Take That" which was like eating a Take 5 candy bar mixed with a treasure chest.  Every time I took a bite I was finding something new; pretzels, chocolate, caramel, fudge, whoppers, a doughnut hole, flan, some skittles- it was an extremely tasty treat to eat while people watching.  And by "people" I mean mean "thousands of single ladies in short shorts and cowboy boots ready to go clubbing."

We didn't go in or eat there, but it's a giant guitar with Stark Tower in the background!  

It begged to be photographed.

So we basically walked around, went in some shops, listened to all the live country music coming from the clubs and I finally got a hand-painted Christmas ornament in this store:

COTTON EYED JOE's!!!

(The DJ in me couldn't resist)

Here is a lovely photo of the Cinderella-esque carriage you can rent on Broadway.  Right in front of the open air, two-story bar we dubbed "The Great And Spacious" Saloon.

And now for everything else I didn't show you, in completely random order:

Brian's apartment complex pool...

There is nothing cooler than getting to catch fireflies with your dad :)

Here is Brian rocking out while playing the Olivia guitar....

I had seen this place both times I had been to Chris and Molly's previously. It always made me laugh and wonder.  Well, not anymore!  Trueloves' Pizza and Grits- you are mine!

I have no earthly idea why pizza and grits is a combination.  By all accounts it makes no sense. Other than a publicity stunt to get people to spend money finding out for themselves.  Well, it worked!  Here is Jacob eating the grits in question.

I think they should be called mexi-grits. Tomatoes, peppers, chiles, cheese- not a bad way to jazz those things up a bit!

Here is an excellent photobomb by Ana...

Here is a sign from the Pizza restaurant:

(Just for some background, this town is obsessed with mules.  Yes, mules.  They have mule days once a year, with mule floats and mule parades.  Need more proof?  This poster is hanging in the pizza restaurant, remember?)

The cousins about to hit the pool... 

Sadie let me borrow a headband for church.  I was feeling pretty stylin' with my straight hair.  Yep, straight hair in July.  That just shows the amazing weather we had for our trip.  It was cool at night, low humidity during the day and we only had one day of real cloud cover.  Heaven! Jacob and I even got up three days in a row and went running through the neighborhood.

Cindy loved getting to hold Sadie and Ana's rabbits.  Here she is with Flopsy.



This is the inflatable slide that provided hours and hours and hours of cousin fun :)

And here is Uncle Jacob showing Luke and Wyatt the secrets to becoming Plants vs. Zombies masters...

Here is Luke wearing Sadie's hat...

Me and Cindy with the incredibly happy Olivia.

And finally, here is a little fun we had with the camera and the trampoline.  

I present our version of Vadering:

It's ALWAYS a party when Aunt Kelly is there :)

Vanderblog

We didn't plan it that way, but our trip to Tennessee allowed us to be there for Brian's "white coat" ceremony at Vanderbilt, which is where all the first year med students are given their little outfits that they will wear for the rest of their schooling lives.  This was an especially fun event to attend while sitting next to my brother Chris, who had his own white coat ceremony 9 years ago at Florida State.  Chris's wife Molly went home with all the kids an hour before and did not have to attend the ceremony, but before she left we were given firm instructions that if we were supposed to cheer for Brian when he got his coat we needed to be ready with what we would yell out.  Chris immediately shouted, "You're making a huge mistake! Don't do it!" I don't think Molly liked that cheer.

Sadly there was no actual cheering at this ceremony.  It was only 45 minutes long and was no more complicated than 105 kids in a classroom putting on a jacket.  As we were sitting and waiting for the ceremony to start, we were looking over the program, which was basically a list of names and the universities for each show off.  Lots of Princetons, Harvards and Yales among that group. (But five Mormons. Oh yeah!)  At one point Chris leaned over my shoulder to scan the names.

Chris: You know, a medical school is only as good as the number of Patels that are in the class. How many does this one have?

Me: One.

Chris:  Fail. This whole school is a failure. 

We were going to tell my mom that this was the ONLY picture that we got of the whole entire ceremony and that my camera died.  She loves a good joke, right?

Okay, here is one photo of the super exciting moment at the end when all the students read some docotry oath all together.  It seriously sounded like they should have ended it with "We are the Borg. Resistance is futile."  

And here we have me and my brothers; the future Dr. Brian and my inactive brother Chris.  That was the joke with this picture anyway.  Probably because he looks like he is holding a beer.  He wasn't.  But I am still not going to reveal the actual contents of that glass :)

I thought this picture would make an excellent meme...

Well if anyone could do it, it would be him.

After the ceremony we hit the school bookstore for some birthday shopping for my dad. 

And a few shenanigans....

That helmet is now in my dad's office being worn by the life-size Ronald Raegan. I think Chris looks like an Angry Birds Darth Vader, don't you?  And I am currently in the process of photoshopping that picture of Jacob to make the Vanderbilt logo into a giant blue Y.  I will need to post it day one of college football season so we all can see how much Jacob supports the Cougars!

Another fun thing to do in the bookstore is to add the prefix "Vander" to anything that starts with the letter B.  Need a Vanderbook? A mini Vanderbat and Vanderball? How about a Vanderbelt or some Vanderboots?  They got it!  And they will even put it in a lovely Vanderbag for you when you're done.


And just as Mormons flock to visit temples across the country, teachers flock to uppity university signs to get their picture taken.

Final post tomorrow! To Nashville and Beyond!