Television's Finest?

You know what's frustrating? Not being able to find enough shows on TV about cops, crime and murder. I mean, really, what's a girl gotta do to do to find a good drama about violence, malfeasance and uber-savvy police detectives that slickly solve crimes in 60 minutes or less with nothing but their dashing good looks and sharp attention to detail? Oh, wait, I guess I just have to turn on my TV to any channel at any hour of any day and I will find one. Silly me!


As a person living in the land without cable, my TV choices are limited to begin with. But you can't swing a dead cat without hitting a cop/crime show on television. First, there is the Law and Order series, which I believe is under some sort of Federal mandate that it be airing on a channel somewhere at least 20 hours out of every day. (Personally, I think the spin-off Law and Order: Food Stamp Patrol is a bit of a stretch....) But then we also have Rookie Blue, Dark Blue, Dark Blueish Rookies,CSI: Miami, CSI: New York, CSI: Tatooine, Bones, Cold Case, Lie to Me, NCIS, Castle, The Closer, COPS, The Mentalist, Southland, Criminal Minds, Detroit 187, Memphis Beat, Rizzoli & Isles- and those are just a few of the ones currently on the air. Not to even mention the fact that Hawaii Five-0 and The Rockford Files are both being remade and coming back to TV this season. (I swear If CHiPS comes back I am taking a hostage...) Seriously? Is there really nothing else to have a show about? It's always about murder. Bo-ring! It's always about insurance money. Yawn! It's always about a mistress and revenge. Predictable! Or kidnapping, or covering up a crime and trying to get away with it, or killing your transvestite boss because he made you work one too many swing shifts. Is this really all we have to choose from? I think we need to ban all future cop/crime shows. There is just no need for them. We have plenty already! And here are the only 5 of those shows we really need:

1. COPS- The original reality TV show. Because this truth is stranger than fiction nearly 100% of the time. And like a bad accident, you just can't turn away from it....
2. Psych- Because it's hilarious. And if there's gonna be murder and crime, let's at least make it enjoyable, am I right? Plus, the facial expressions of Gus are unequaled anywhere on television.

3. Medium- Because it combines a little sci-fi and a tiny creepiness factor into police work that is about as far as I need to go into the world of death and disturbing violence.


4. Alias- I have said it before and I will say it again, Jennifer Garner on this show is one of the only actual, believable, butt-kicking girl spies I have ever seen. Every other character is too over the top in looks and attitude. I believe she really exists somewhere.

5. Monk- Because to make a good show, you need a really unique character to begin with. And 'unique' is definitely the right word for this guy.

Honorable mentions: Numb3rs (as a math teacher's wife, I am required to endorse this one), CSI Miami, Matlock, Moonlighting, Remington Steele (I am my mother's daughter), The Unusuals, and The Sweeney (even though I have never seen this British cop show, obviously it must be pretty awesome).

Don't get me wrong, cop shows have their place. It's just that it's apparently in every television time slot from 8am-8pm. Well, I gotta run, Grey's Anatomy is on. It's a drama that takes place in a hospital! Isn't that original and cool!!??