Finally, This Coaching Thing is Paying Off

Right after Christmas, Jacob was begged to coach a girls competitive soccer team in a tournament down in Fort Lauderdale.  To sweeten the deal they said they would pay for a hotel and he would get reimbursed for mileage.  We are not ones to look a gift team in the mouth, so he agreed and the whole family got to tag along. Which made for a nice little mini vacay in the sweltering December heat.

Luke is a very calm and even keeled kid, but if you want to see him go a little nuts,
check him into a hotel and show him his bed.

We kept the hotel room cold enough for Cindy
to wear her new hoodie from Grandma and Grandpa Bingham

Killing time at the soccer park

100 bonus points for finding Cindy in this picture

The sunny weather was enough to fool Cindy into happiness
and she accidentally smiled in this photo

I can find batting cages like a drug sniffing dog finds cocaine

The route from our hotel to the soccer fields took us right by the temple every time

Day 2 of the tournament was a long one, so the kids and I snuck away for a day at Hollywood Beach.  Wow, it was gorgeous and the weather was sunny and warm.  Our Gulf of Mexico selves were not used to the "giant" Atlantic coast waves, but Luke was in absolute heaven.  He would still be there if I didn't drag him out when the parking meter was up.

Meanwhile, this is what happens when Cindy realizes that the lifeguard is flying the purple flag to warn everyone of jellyfish.  

I will swim....here.  

Eventually she got up the gumption to go in and battle the waves.  And Luke finally obeyed my command to take this obligatory picture:

Seagull punching knows no coastline.

As far as beaches go, this one was pretty incredible.  I definitely would love to go back sometime and walk/bike/skate/saunter down the boardwalk there.  So let's find another tournament, shall we?

And Now For Something Completely Different

Here is a picture of Luke "dressed" as a snowman at the Cub Scout Christmas Pack Meeting.

Christmas In 8 Pictures or Less

Let's face it, no one is truly as interested in your pictures and memories as you are, so I will make our 2015 Christmas re-cap short and sweet.

Santa brought scooters....

Kids got stockings...

Weather was WARM....

There was a lot of delicious cereal....

"Bounce Off" was the surprise game hit of the year...

Nate and Linn's bow and arrow also beat all expectations...

Cindy smiled in a photo....

Jenny Ellen saved the day with a family photo :)

Children Roasting in Their Long-sleeved Styles

If I had known back in October that we would be shooting for record heat here in Florida this Christmas, I definitely would have chosen different pajamas for the kids this year.  

Here's hoping that they can actually be needed at least once before summer!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Normal smiles? A Christmas miracle!

Aaaaand......the miracle is over

A Luke Quickie

The other day I was at Publix with Luke.  We were on the paper goods aisle and he was looking at all the garbage bags.  Suddenly he looked very confused, but then he got a big smile on his face.  I asked him what was going on and he said,

"I saw this package and I thought it said "tall CHICKEN bags" and I was so confused because how can that dog eat all that chicken if he can barely even reach the top of the can?"  56 bags that are that tall and full of chicken in that little box?  I'll take two.  

Disney S(pr)ings

One of the perks of living here in Central Florida is the close proximity to all things Disney.  Cindy's middle school chorus auditioned and got chosen to sing at the Disney Springs Waterside Stage a week ago.  It was hot and humid for mid-December (still is), but better to be still in shorts and flip flops than scrounging around for "warm clothes" and having nothing to wear.  The kids all got to go to Epcot for the day, which I passed on because I was just there last December with Luke.  I drove over just to watch the performance, get some free chocolate from Ghirardelli's, and take in the massive amounts of Star Wars merchandise in the official Disney store.

Dancing Bears and Morning Snowfall

Another year of piano has come and gone!  And now here is the fruit of Luke's labors...

A Brian Quickie

As you may know, I donate plasma twice a week.  A few months ago I told my poor, medical student brother Brian about it and how easy it is to make some good money.  He found a center there in Nashville and now we get to share our adventures in plasma donation together!  The coolest part about it is that not only is it super easy, but the center has free WiFi, so the running joke is that we are basically getting paid to watch Netflix.  This was our observation from last night:

This was also the same text convo where Brian sent me a photo of an awesome flyer he saw for a lost cat:

Brian's comment:  "I think we all know why he ran away."

A Luke Quickie

The other day in the car Luke said, "You know what would be fun?  Riding in the back of a truck with a bunch of bunnies."  On an unrelated note, does anyone have a truck or a bunch of bunnies I could borrow? I need to test a theory...

A Christmas Bullseye!

Finally got my Choctaw Nation of Oklahoma Christmas ornament for 2015!  

It features a super cool Choctaw hunter with a bow and arrow.  

Or as Cindy calls him, "Katniss." 

From the tribe of District 12

Happy Belated Thanksgiving

It's that time of year again when we pause to reflect and give thanks for all the blessings we each have.  And right after that is the time we make fun of all the ridiculous items donated to the annual County food drive! 

First up is this extremely appetizing "Bacon Dressing."  So basically what you are telling me is that someone made a salad dressing using the same stuff I drain off of my food and pour in my yard to kill weeds?  

I LOVE THIS COUNTRY!!!

Here is this year's winner from the "Non-edible (but I can kinda sorta see where you might have thought it may have been a different kind of oil)" category. In their defense, coconut oil is all the rage nowadays.

Okay, but seriously, who even uses this crap?

Sweet flippin' follicles, this stuff is amazing!  My hair feels so shiny and strong! Where do I buy this?? 

According to the package, this crust mix is Step 1 of making a delicious no bake cheesecake.  Step 2 is realizing you do not have Step 2 or 3, and Step 3 is being sad.  

Why?

I love Kalamata olives as much as the next guy, but I am not sure that making it into a sandwich spread is really going to entice people to find out how delicious they are.

 And according to a recent survey, here are the Top Ten Least Popular Spread Flavors for 2015:

10.  Peppermint
9.  Squid
8.  Licorice
7.  Hot Pocket
6.  Turtle
5.  10 year old gravy
4.  Earthworm
3.  Cantaloupe
2.  Barbecued Bat
1.  Pine

Okay, seriously, if you have an extra 10 minutes, click this link and visit a gallery of the weirdest REAL Japanese Kit Kat candy bars flavors you ever saw in your life.  The Japanese; they do what they want.

Life Pro Tip #12:  If you are ever on Jeopardy and the answer is "This drink was considered to be the prized potion of ancient kings", well, here ya go.  Don't forget to specify "vanilla decaf" when you tell Alex the answer.

Finally! Something normal and totally appropriate for the food drive.  A humble bag of turkey gravy mix.

Let me just check the code date on this thing...Only missed it by TEN YEARS.  So close!

How is the package still intact??

It was a barn burner, but coming in right behind the turkey gravy mix, is this expired Ragu from 2006.  Not only is it a hearty, deep red color, it also comes in convenient bottle-shaped form even after removing it from the jar.

Well sure, you have the sauce, but what is going to taste just right with 9 year spaghetti old sauce?

I know, how about these 5 year old Udon noodles?  Italian sauce over Japanese noodles "traditionally crafted" in Clinton, Michigan; it's a match made in expiration heaven! 

And finally, this year's "Careful, Don't Want to Give Too Much" award goes to this bag of airline pretzels..

I said, like, Dotty, LIKE you.  And by "like" we really mean "resent."

No worries, I really like all my readers.  

Happy Thanksgiving from Sweeneyville :)

Into The History Books

As head soccer coach of the McKeel Girls team, Jacob is now officially part of the "100 Wins Club." It came at the hands of Avon Park last Tuesday night, and even though we had to drive the hour down there, and pay to get in AND we ended the game by mercy rule at halftime, it was well worth it to be there to support him on this accomplishment.

Worst coach's wife in the history of coach's wives redeeming herself BIG TIME! 

Just look at those signs, man!

Lady Wildcats 2015-2016

I have discovered the trick to raising the chances of getting a good picture of Cindy.  It is to A. not take one at all or B. have a stranger do it.  She usually doesn't have the guts to go goofy on someone she doesn't know.

CONGRATULATIONS, JACOB!

Beware The Long Green Gourd

Just in case you aren't one of the cool kids, here's a new thing that's making the rounds:  Cucumbering Your Cat.





Crazy, right?  Crazy AWESOME!  The day that my brother in law Sean sent this to me I went out and bought a cucumber and we tried it on Cucuface.....and.........


Zero. Reaction.

Okay, fine.  Here, Yoshi, Yoshi.....