Humans vs. Cats

HOW HUMANS SPEND THEIR SUMMER:

Going to the pool...

Eating Popsicles...

Finding "king fry"....

Playing some soccer....

Tie dyeing some shirts...

Going back to the pool...

Making some bird feeders...

Taking in a bat show...

Doing some finger knitting...

Napping after a hard game of Fruit Ninja....

HOW CATS SPEND THEIR SUMMER:

Watching the caterpillar on the trashcan. 

Official score:  Humans 1, Cats 0

My Official Review of Man of Steel

WARNING: If want to see this movie before you know what I thought, please go see the movie right now and then read this during the credits to see just how right I am.

First off, I want to say that I had incredibly high expectations for this movie.  If Superman could turn into a trilogy on the same plane as the likes of the Batman trilogy, all would be right with the world.  Well, it's safe to say that all is not right with the world.  I don't want to say that I hated the movie. I didn't. I just needed to lower my expectations. Twenty six levels.  So without further ado...

Pros
The movie had a good overall plot line
Amy Adams was definitely a way less annoying version of Lois Lane as I have heretofore seen.  I need to admit right now that I never liked her character in any of the movies.
It was great to see Kevin Costner again.  I have missed that guy!
No krypyonite
Got to see the preview for Catching Fire
We got to see it in IMAX for less than the price of a regular matineee thanks to the BOGO Fandango code I found on slickdeals.net. Cha-ching!

Cons
It takes for-ev-er for the movie to really get going
There is not very much dialogue for Superman and some of the dialogue in the movie was really cheesy.  ("This is madness!" It kinda sounded like I wrote it. Not good.)
A LOT of sci-fi in this movie.
No genuine humor, zero character development.
Special effects were completely over the top.
Bring some trail mix with you or smuggle in some Subway because it's LONG.  I looked at my phone five times.
No memorable music and sadly, the original Superman theme was no where in sight :(
When all was said and done, it felt like I just watched Battleship- only directed by Michael Bay.  Sigh.

And now here is the biggest puzzler of them all.  Seriously, my puzzler is hurting from this one.

Exhibit A
Henry Cavill as Clark Kent: A young, American farm boy with gorgeous eyes and endless charm.  This picture doesn't really do it justice, but if you watch the film you will understand what I mean.

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Exhibit B:

Henry Cavil as Superman: A cranky-looking old man who looks like he is 312 years old.  This does not make sense to me.  Perhaps this is the only Superman movie wherein Clark can stay disguised simply by taking off the suit because they really don't look like each other at all.  His Superman is way too serious and his brow never seems to uncrinkle.

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If I had to sum up this movie in one phrase:  It was like watching two indestructible airplane black boxes fight each other for three hours.   Super-disappointed :(

Cindy and Luke Quickies

Last night Luke ran in to our hallway door for about the fifth time- giving himself yet another large bruise on his forehead.  After we heard the noise, Luke came up to me crying and said, "It's just that I think we need to move!"  Poor kid.  Poles and doors just cannot leave him alone!


Jacob has been studying for the past few days for an upcoming test that will allow him to teach upper level high school math classes.  As he was sitting at the kitchen table today doing rather long and complex algebraic equations, Cindy came in and looked at the paper and said, "I do NOT see how you find that enjoyable."  Right there with you, Cindy :)

Publisher's Note

If you click on the first photo in the post below, you will be taken to a screen where you can scroll through them all in a larger format.  Don't say I didn't tell you.

A Smashing Good Time

I promised the kids that one day during the summer I would get a bunch of water balloons and let them hit them with bats and tennis rackets.  Since they are both part elephant and never forget anything I say to them that involves water balloons, we did this yesterday.  Which is like 20 days past when they wanted to do it, but they finally got their wish and so what are they complaining about?  I highly encourage anyone with kids (or not) to give this a try and take pictures- you never know what you are going to catch :)

I took this picture with my left hand while my right hand threw the very last water balloon to Cindy.  She absolutely obliterated it with her bat.  Maybe she hasn't forgotten how to play softball after all!

Is it Just Me?

Or does US Mens Soccer team midfielder Brad Evans.....

                               ....look an awful lot like Karl Urban in the new Star Trek movies?

AND HOLD THE PHONE, PEOPLE!  

DID YOU KNOW THAT HE IS ALSO THIS GUY?!!!  

My whole life is a lie.

Shear Joy

Are you tired of birds following you in hopes of finding a place to nest in your hair?  Do you get embarrassed when people on the street give you money because they think you are homeless? Are you frustrated because your "vagabond chic" is a style that hasn't caught on?  Well, then you need a haircut!  Haircuts are one of the hottest fashion statements you can make right now!








Using space-age technology that combines water and scissors, a professional can actually shorten the length of your hair- giving you confidence, cleanliness and the amazing ability for others to actually see your face! 

Haircuts- Get yours today! 

A Luke Quickie

Cindy:  I am going to tell you two short jokes and a long one.
Luke: Okay.
Cindy:  Joke. Joke.  Jooooooooooooke.
Luke:  Was that the short one or the long one?

To The Moon!

I saw this on Pinterest and found it highly amusing....

Summer Siesta

This week I started working just two full days a week.  Which  means the kids are home all day with Dad.  When I got home on Tuesday I asked Jacob how it went and to answer me he showed me this picture:

So either Jacob worked my children like migrants in a field or the day was so boring that sleeping was the most exciting thing to do.  Or Luke simply does not have the stamina for a day that happens after going to bed past 10pm the night before.

Here he is again yesterday at 5pm.  Summer is exhausting!

A Dream Delayed

As our first official family act of summer, Monday night we headed out to the Lakeland Tigers baseball game.  What can I say? We just love baseball!  It is our favorite sport and we know all the players and there is just- okay, okay, it was dollar night and the tickets to get in and then all the food was a dollar.  And so how are we not even supposed to go to this game, huh? Such a deal! The evening started off incredibly magical.  We walked right in, bought 8 hot dogs, 4 sodas, some pretzels and then Luke got chosen to race South Paw, the Tigers Mascot, around the bases.  He was so excited!  He just had to wait til the bottom of the third inning and racing glory would be his!!!

The calm before the storm.  Literally.

And then God must have realized that a truly awful sinner was sitting in the crowd and he decided to unleash his wrath upon the stadium in the form of the most ridiculous thunderstorm I have been in in about five years.  (Or this is Central Florida and it's summer and so what else do you expect?)  And it started right in the bottom of the third inning.  So Luke's chance to show the world his incredible speed would have to wait for another day :(

The grounds crew pulled out the tarps just seconds before the storm arrived.  Luke still got free ice cream and the promotions gal told us to come back another night and she would let him race again, but he was pretty disappointed. I, on the other hand, was chosen to do some sort of "dizzy bat" race in the fourth inning and was quite relieved the game was over :)

Davina, my video fails to capture the magnitude of the storm....and it is quite dark, but here it is, for posterity:




I do want to note that toward the end of the storm, there was a lightning strike so close, we could hear a whizzing sound through the air and the force of the thunder hit us right in the chest.
One of the closer calls of my life, probably.

Dollar night doesn't happen again for a few weeks, so Luke has some time to train.  We are headed to the track right now.  You can't be too careful with South Paw....

What Day Is It?

Summer has only been official since Thursday, but I am already finding myself losing track of the days.  I haven't blogged since Wednesday! You see?!  I gotta be honest too, this might be one long summer.  My kids have yet to master the art of "entertaining yourself." Darn me for being so fun!  But they want me involved in absolutely everything they do- games, crafts, movies, outside activities, books- and sometimes it can be a little exhausting.  I am flattered they want me around so much and I know there will come a day when they will want anyone BUT me to do stuff with them, but isn't it normal to say to kids "go play" and they will? At least for fifteen minutes?


The last 5 days in pictures:

We painted rocks....

In the time we did this craft, I painted 8 rocks, Cindy painted 6 and Luke managed 1.  Care to guess which one rock is his?





I got a speeding ticket....

My very first one in 18 years of driving.  I would like to say I am really upset or cried about it for hours, but not one tear was shed.  I was basically just annoyed by the whole process.  So I will be sure to pay the ticket on day 29.  In pennies.






Luke started soccer....

I was really on the fence about signing Luke up for soccer, but decided to pull the trigger in the end.  Saturday was his first game and I didn't quite know what to expect.  I thought I would see a lot of standing around, complaining, possibly a lot of Luke watching the other soccer games or him looking at the clouds and deciding what animals they looked like.  But what I ended up getting was a kid that was running, kicking, trapping, and scoring!  (And getting bit by a jillion fire ants within two minutes of being on the field, poor guy.)  I have to say that Luke is very fast and he seems to like to run!  I just got him some new Adidas cleats off eBay that are way to big, but he doesn't care whatsoever and happily wears three pairs of socks to make them a little more snug.  He scored twice and hit the poles twice.  So far, so good!



We planted over 30 sunflowers...

Waiting for sprouts

I told the kids that if they had enough that grew real big they could cut them and sell them at a little stand at the end of our driveway for a dollar a piece.  They are excited about their money making prospects!  And bonus, the sunflowers will also help stave off a zombie invasion :)  Which may be the real reason I wanted to plant those so bad...



Okay, true confession time: I had to lay off the Insanity for a while.  I made it to day 23 doing every workout without fail, however, I finally had to give in the usually pansy advice of "listen to your body."  Mine was saying something to the effect of "If you make me do one more power squat I am going on strike.  And then when you don't wake up tomorrow morning you're gonna feel pretty sorry for pushing me so hard, aren't you?"  Okay, body. You win.  I took a full day off on Wednesday and ran for the first time in three weeks Thursday and Friday. And today I am pretty sure I might die in the next week.  I feel like I am 96 years old! Everything hurts.  If I were to self diagnose I would say I have arthritis, chrondomalacia, a rotator cuff tear, shin splints, osteoporosis, plantar fasciitis, and asthma. And possibly shingles. With a touch of glaucoma. Okay, just kidding on the shingles, I don't even know what those are, but at this point I am not ruling anything out.  So what do we learn from this?  Getting old sucks.  Glad I could bring you this public service announcement.  I am not giving up and throwing in the towel on exercise by any means, but I think I need to take it down a level or two while my body gets used to the abuse.

And finally, you deserve a picture of a rocket cat. You are very welcome.

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I Just Wanna Freeze This Moment

I really should be taking these of Jacob too...

Luke looks like he grew two years, doesn't he?  At least the cat was making them laugh this morning and I didn't have to resort to child abuse to get a good smile out of these guys...

My Official Review of Star Trek Into Darkness

Well, summer movie season is in full swing and you are going to be seeing a lot of movie reviews around here in Sweeneyville.  I mean, Fast and Furious 6, Hatchet 3, Grown Ups 2- I am going to have my work cut out for me!

I was really hoping that Cindy would be writing this review for everyone, but she has it in her head that it would be just for me to make fun of her.  Inconceivable! And mostly untrue!  I only got the idea because when I told her that I needed to write a review of this movie she said, "Here is a review for you; "Star Trek: The WORST MOVIE IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD!"  For a kid who makes us watch thousands of hours of Barbie movies you would think she would be able to tolerate a little Trek in her life and take one for the team. Sheesh! One day, she is going to be like me and get sucked into it and love it.  One day, Cindy!  But until that day, here is my take on the flick...


Pros
I finally got to see what Sherlock would look like with a haircut and without a scarf
Chris Pine's shockingly blue eyes are still alive and well :)
Spocks bangs looked great
Opening scene pays great homage to the original series.  The Enterprise underwater?!
Contained the best line ever (spoken by Scotty) "I am running!"
It inspired us to watch the Star Trek TOS episode "Space Seed" (first meeting with Kahn) and
realize that Lt. Marla McGivers was the biggest doofus of a character in Trek history.
This movie finally set up the whole "five year mission" of randomly scouring the galaxy just for fun, which leaves tons of room for pretty much anything in future movies.
We got to see the preview for Despicable Me 2 


Cons (or should I say, "Khans."  Hahahahaha! I kill me.)
Klingons not Klingony enough
It made Jacob watch Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Again.
I cried.
Is Peter Weller even allowed to play a character that is not shifty and double-crossing?
Still on the fence about the Tribble scene. It served it's purpose, but felt contrived.


Jacob has now seen the movie twice and I have committed to see it once again when it hits the $3 theater.  Needless to say, we loved it.  However, having just watched the first Star Trek by JJ Abrams, I still think that one comes out the winner between the two.  For the record, Luke saw the movie with us too and his official review was, "It was awesome!!!!"  I actually did watch him a lot during the movie and he was completely sucked into it the entire time. Not one bathroom break or nap or attempt at laying on me to have his back scratched. He was hooked!  Our plan is working out rather nicely....

A Visual Luke Quickie

*Disclaimer:  I have had to switch to a new free program for all my photo editing needs.  There is a learning curve involved and it definitely is not as user friendly as my old program, so please bare with my rudimentary photoshopping skills.  (Thought bubbles don't come pre-made with this one.  Are you kidding me? You had ONE job, paint.net! One. Job.)


So the other night out at dinner we ordered some spinach and artichoke dip.  Cindy wouldn't touch it with a one hundred and seven foot pole, however, Luke was all about giving it a try.  After taking a bite, he said he liked it and Jacob told him it must be because of the spinach and that it would make him strong like Popeye. Then I wondered if Luke even knew who that was. So I asked him if he ever heard of Popeye before.  He immediately shook his head yes.  I was shocked.  I said, "Really?"  And then he said "Yeah, I eat that for dinner all the time."  I was totally confused.  And then it dawned on me.

Me:

Luke:

Something tells me he knows who Olive Oyl is too.